The path of least resistnace to the New Year

Happy New Year everyone. It’s been a while since I last wrote and I blame Sherin. Everyone knows that a surefire way to come up with a story is to do something stupid and document the consequence. For example: class elections rap, bartending at sandblast, going euro in prague with tight pants, Carnivale, Moped, Moped (I feel like it needs to be in here twice), library guerilla wars, Dodgeball and Thanksgiving. Everyone also knows that sensible girlfriends worth keeping tend to stop us from achieving our true potential for idiocy. So I don’t write as much. Now Sherin is complaining that I don’t write enough. This is so much fun.

Since Thanksgiving, life at school meant life in the library. Around this time I started to get very sick with constant sinus problems. I figured it was just the stress of studying and little sunlight. One day late in, I saw a friend of mine spraying his desk with Lysol and wiping it down. He told me this:

“Before Immuno, a few of us came in early to cram and we saw the cleaning ladies. From the same bucket of water they cleaned the bathroom floor, toilet and urinal. They then dropped rags into the bucket and wiped down every desk in the library. No wonder everyone has been getting so sick.”

Thank you Grenadian cleaning lady; it was great taking my exams sick.

As I got healthy I was able to spend more time learning from Sherin. For instance, when Sherin remarks that it is cool out tonight that means I’m cold because Sherin is now wearing my jacket. When Sherin realizes that she hasn’t been given a fork I realize that I have no fork. Sherin does not want dessert, she wants my dessert. These lessons culminated when the roomates took the girlfriends out to dinner. Sherin was sitting with her back exposed when it began to rain. At this point I prempted and demanded that we trade spaces. The table began to give me a ribbing for being so chivalrous. I’d like to set the record straight: I was just avoiding the situation where I look like an ass for letting her get wet BEFORE I have to trade places. So much of dating is finding the path of least resistance.


The next day was spent walking the capital in search of crap to buy. I came out the big winner with a baby-blue GRENADA baseball cap. Which I wore proudly. On an impulse move, we packed up, bought groceries and headed for LaSagesse. We took the roof off of Sherin’s Jeep and let the wind blow through our hair. I felt left out.

LaSagesse is a breath-taking beach that we had to ourselves. All the boys suffer from ADD, so when the football and paddle tennis got old it was time to leave. I had so much fun driving up and down the hills and turns to get there that Sherin insisted on driving back. I almost made it the whole way without saying something about her driving. Not the path of least resistance.

With Sherin away in New York I am trying to keep busy back home. Popop (grandfather) has taken me to a few basketball games. Home Team played a team named Chicago State(?) whose two top scorers are under 5’6″, none of which makes any sense. Uncle Laurence is letting me see patients with him. Every day he asks me some simple question in front of a patient that I completely fumble. Oh, if the students I tutor could see me now. And by the way, you have carpel tunnel syndrome. It’s the ADHD of neurology.

I find myself looking up to my brother, Calvin, these days. He’s been dating his girlfriend for over a year now while I’m not half that. He was brave enough to bring her to Christmas dinner at Gagi and Popop’s. The ride over was a coaching session to stay close to Calvin, relatives in clusters are trouble, and watch out for Aunt Katy. Are you reading this, Sherin? Watch out for Aunt Katy.

In other holiday news: I’m sure everyone will believe me when I say that a good portion of Christmas’ Eve dinner was spent looking up the etymology of “kilter” as in “off kilter”. Nobody knows where it comes from, incidentely. We ended up discussing the true height of Hugh Jackman, Sting, and The Governator: 6’3″, 6′ and 5’10” (but he wears lifts).

Well, I think that about does it. I head back to GND in a few days which leaves me precious little time to do something stupid. I know you’re all pulling for me.

Happy New Year everyone, topher.

Addendum: I’m kidding, Aunt Katy.

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